stockholm syndrome

Sunday, April 7, 2013

Yesterday I picked up my dear friend Ruddy and told him he had no say in what we were going to do.

So I picked him up and off we went! My first stop was the LACMA, off of the Venice exit, which I mentioned only to have him inform me that he'd never been to Venice Beach. Well, we can't have that, can we? So rather than taking the right turn for LACMA I turned left and drove straight until we hit the Pacific. I guess he kind of had a say in what we did.

Everyone has to see Venice at least once. So we walked the streets then onto the beach in our museum-best apparel (sweaters, cardigans, collared shirts, and leather boots) from Venice to Santa Monica and back. It was... hot, but well worth it.

After we tired ourselves from the mesmerizing image of waves crashing onto the shore and were hungry enough we headed out to Umami burger to have one of the most delicious burgers around, no joke. We explored their little gallery that they had at some Fred Segal place (who apparently hearts you).

Finally we rushed over to The Getty Center to run from one exhibit to the next in the final hour before they closed.

Live is grand. Be impulsive. Live a little.

Disney's Dapper Day!

Thursday, February 28, 2013

I am very happy to say that I had a chance to participate in this "Spring's" Dapper Day at Disneyland! (I say "Spring" because that's what they're calling it but come on, guys! It's still Winter!) Anyway, here are some shots of me and Stephanie, in our dapper finest.

Puppy Love

This year marks the first time in 8 years that I didn't have a Valentine.

But I'm okay with that.

So I decided to celebrate by taking my favorite guy, Rupert, out to Forest Falls to play in the snow.

Ceez just tagged along in case of bears.

Here are the pictures;

and here's Rupert helping Cesar make a Snow Angel, because this takes group effort!

This will probably be the last time I get to play in the snow this year.

Darn that California sun!

To be or not to be: the ideal self and the problem with New Year's resolutions

Monday, January 7, 2013

(This is where I spent my New Year's celebration. FYI, don't light sparklers indoors.)

Ok, so this post is kind of a week late. Whatever.

I have mixed feelings regarding New Year's Resolutions. I think it can be a burden and disheartening (when you inevitable fail to lose 20 lbs in two months!) to hold yourself up to crazy expectations with the change of the calendar. But I also believe that growth and change should be a constant journey and stagnation the enemy.

I knew someone who once not-very-humblug bragged about how much better he was than those of us struggling to get our lives together, simply because he had a spouse and had figured out what he wanted to do with his life ages ago. Inevitably, life plays cruel tricks on us all as we learn that growth is a lifelong process with no real destination in sight.

I guess more than anything these "resolutions" are aspirations of what I want to see come about in 2013, as there are a lot of changes occurring.

So these are my New Year's Desires, Aspirations, Hopes, and Dreams. (Ok, they're just resolutions.)

1. Go Big or Go Home
Twenty-thirteen seems to be the year full of lasts, and as a result should be chalk-full of lasting memories. This is the year that my best friend after marvelously being accepted to Humboldt will be moving 12 hours away to Arcata to work on her Bachelor's sometime around Summer. My closest and dearest friends from High School will be moving up to Sacramento (what is that, 9 hour away? Come on, people!) to room together during the upcoming year as well. This is the year of last birthdays spent together but this is also the year of fun Firsts. Like the inevitably road trip to Arcata to help my friend get acquainted with her new hometown. This just means everything is going to have to be that much more amazing and memorable. 
2. Photograph. A lot.
Having grown tired of  not following my ambitions I decided on a whim to sign up for UCLA's Photography Program. That's right, I'll finally be taking time out of my not-so-busy schedule to learn a few new tips and tricks for my favorite pastime. March will mark my last days as a Highlander at UC Riverside and with it comes my degree in Psychology. But also in March I will become a Bruin, and that's pretty damn cool.
3. Travel
My fondest memories of my youth are of my summer's spent in the pueblo's of Mexico exploring the landscapes on horseback with my Father or laying beachside the absolutely mind-blowingly warmth (seriously, I'm talking bath water warm) of the waters in the playas Lo De Marcos in Rincon de Guayabitos. So stunningly perfect was it all that I committed every bit of it to memory. I saw that beach again two years ago, since then having become privatized much to my mother's annoyance and chagrin, but the water's remained every bit as glorious as my memory recalled. The point is as an adult it's time to make my own lasting memories of travel in marvelous places. This is my year.
4. Work Out
As much as I joke about what a pain and burden it is to work out, I really need to get back into it again. I realized that 2012 was the year of the slob. I can't possibly let that happen again. Twenty-thirteen is my year! Literally, the Chinese Zodiac dictates that it is once again the Year of the Snake so it's my time to reign supreme. But yeah, I'll be training for a 5k and joining in on Cardio Kickboxing and Total Body Toning classes at the gym once more (or just jump onto an elliptical somedays, whatever). See also: hiking.
5. Meditate
My mental health took one hell of a beating last year leaving me diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and suffering from occasional Panic Attacks. Yes, occasional, as in it's that bad. It's really not anything I ever feel comfortable sharing with anyone besides family and my therapist. Because it sucks and to some extent the Average Joe simply doesn't know what to make of it when I say reality doesn't feel real, ya dig? After a series of meetings with my therapist it's finally been determined that I am eligible to take part in Biofeedback meetings which is essentially a means of teaching me how to calm down and organize my inner turmoil. I also insist that I must continue to attempt to do yoga.
6. Read
I must admit I did significantly better last year than I have in previous years (I'd say since High School) so I'm just going to go with it and keep it up. This year I've already finished reading Bossypants by Tina Fey and am well underway with On The Road by Jack Kerouac. There are also the remaining Game of Thrones series that I need to finish, that is if they can stop breaking my heart enough to become engrossed in the storyline again.
7. Create
Back in October I made my own Princess Mononoke Mask out of papier mache, clay and acrylic paint. Seeing the end result as a result of my own two hand's hard work left me feeling proud. Since then I've taken up knitting (I'm still trying to open up my own knit goods shop, Winterwear Is Coming) and I'm attempting to purchase my own pineapple ukulele. I'd love to get back into painting/drawing and I'm also trying to keep up with this blog and writing. 
8. Hike
This is important. It's become all too obvious to me that the more time I spend indoors the more stagnant and annoyed I become. I really must make the effort to be outdoors (and fit) and hike more often. 
That's it. Those are my resolutions. These are desires that I think I've nurtured for quite some time now and I think it's time I start paying attention to them.

Happy New Year.

Monthly Mixes: January

Friday, January 4, 2013

As a part of my New Year's Resolutions and as a general means of helping my mental health I've been attempting to do really force myself to appreciate the finer things in life. Far too often I find myself consumed with anxious thoughts and neglecting myself, so it really is important for me to quite literally stop and smell the roses.

While I have been making that extra effort to spend time with friends and loved ones I found that I really needed to do something just for myself. In High School I wrote for the school paper explicitly so that I could write about new music (and some half-assed other bullshit). While I lack the capabilities and motivation to keep up a photo (my other love) 365, I'm going to start doing Monthly Mixes! I'm going to try to post them on the first of every month but seeing as how I was running late this month, well, whatever.

Here it is. 

Jeff Buckley // New Year's Prayer
Freelance Whales // Danse Flat
Foxes // Home
Arcade Fire // Deep Blue
Dirty Projectors // Offspring Are Blank
Radical Face // Winter Is Coming
Brendan Benson // Pleasure Seeker
Local Natives // Breakers
The Maccabees // Forever I've Known
Hospitality // Betty Wang
Dirty Projectors // Just From Chevron
Telekinesis // Palm Of Your Hand
Spoon // Don't Make Me a Target
Elliott Smith // Pretty (Ugly Before)
Kings of Convenience // Love Is No Big Truth
Snow Patrol // Run
Bat for Lashes // I Saw A Light
Death Cab for Cutie // The New Year
The Walkmen // Heaven
Sea Wolf // The Cold, The Dark & The Silence
John Frusciante // This Cold
Bon Iver // Re: Stacks


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